Calendar / Directions

Contact Your Hare-Raiser, Whale’s Vagina today to schedule a Hash!

Submit directions for your Hash!

Oct
6
Sun
Hash #1898 – Purple Princess’ 47th Beerthday @ Boyce Park Wave Pool
Oct 6 @ 2:00 pm

Hared by Flicker and Bit ‘O’ Honey.

Make the 2nd left after driving in to the park entrance, to find hash parking.

$5 hash cash to help cover pre-trail, beer stops, and circle beer.  Wear something, anything purple.  A special trail feature could win you a special prize!

Apres at Gateway Grill
4251 Northern Pike
Monroeville PA 15146

Oct
27
Sun
Hash #1901 – Backwards Beer Mile @ Big Jim's
Oct 27 @ 2:00 pm

Prepare to blaze a new trail. Someone is going home with a record. Bring your pioneering spirit, you might find yourself going in new and scintillating directions.

Nov
3
Sun
Hash #1902 – In Defense of Peedom @ Casa de PeeGurglar
Nov 3 @ 2:00 pm
Who: Defender of Peedom
Where: Casa de PeeGurglar
When: November 3, 2019 @2:00 pm
UHAUL leaves promptly @2:30 pm
*SPECIAL NOTES*
Please carpool if possible. Try not to take my neighbor’s parking spots, they usually have family over on Sundays, so please be respectful. If you have to walk a block from your parking spot to my house get over it, you’re hashers and that’ll probably be the easiest part of your day.
Its only been 8 weeks since the birth of our second daughter, the house is in shambles, we’re tired, and I literally can’t even right now…. Yet somehow, my charming wife talked me into haring. I’ve had months to plan this, so there’s one thing you can be sure of, I waited to the absolute last second to put something together.  After a solid  20 minutes of scouting I’ve compiled a short list of things you’re likely to find on trail:
Deer
Deer parts
Deer poop
Deer meat
Deer ticks
Also some things you’re likely to hear:
“Oh I remember when we were here in [insert date]”
“At least, we’re not in the Uhaul anymore.”
“Ugh why am I here?”
“Ugh why was I even born?”
“Why was Defender even born?”
Trail probably isn’t kid friendly, unless you don’t love them, In which case, totally bring em.
Dog friendly?  Yeah, I just don’t want them in my house.
Hasher friendly? Of course, I just don’t want them in my house.
If there’s bad weather trail will be treacherous,  if it’s good weather it’ll be a little less treacherous.
We will have food, drinks, fire and more after trail.
$5 hash cash… I’ve got kids to feed.
Nov
10
Sun
Hash #1903 – Double Crusters Beerthday Trail @ Sto-Rox Middle School
Nov 10 @ 1:30 pm

Hares: Whiff (412-979-3314) and MisterRogers(412-657-7845)

Apres: Carmody’s Grill, 4905 Grand Ave, Neville Island, PA 15225

Cum out for a shiggarific romp through MisterRogers’s Netherworld, where you’ll feel like Dorothy in Oz (“Vines, and jaggers, and burrs! Oh, my!”). The birthday boyz (Whiff – Nov. 10 and MisterRogers – Nov. 12) picked Kennedy Twp. for this trail because they’re two of the few crusters left in the hash who remember where they were when JFK was shot by John Wilkes Booth. This trail is not for pups or baby-papooses, depending on the level of hostility you bear for them, but it’s assured to earn the Flicker Seal of Approval. Huffing and puffing are guaranteed – what you blow down is your own business.

A dry bag, especially shoes, is highly recommended.

Nov
17
Sun
Hash #1904 – Wedding Balls @ Grist House
Nov 17 @ 2:00 pm

Hared by AC/DC and ABS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

The groom is wearing his best dress and the bride is wearing her best hash suit. The hares are getting married.
This. is. a Hash. Wedding.

Cum out, one and all: wear your best formal hash attire… be sure your hash best includes shiggy socks and tick repelent.

Trail is dog-friendly.

***Update: no hash cash. We will NOT be providing food, but Grist house always has a food truck….***

Nov
24
Sun
Hash #1905 – Millvillans! @ Grist House
Nov 24 @ 2:00 pm
Hared by birthday babes Ogre Under, Rimshot, EZ 2 Please, and secret-not-present hare ABS (who will be on her honeymoon).

As villains, we will only provide you with the bare essential details:
Due to some truly evil inspiration we are revising our trail description.
1) PACK IS ON OUT AT 2:30 pm SHARP. Daylight savings time is a thing.
2) Wear shiggy socks. Wear shiggy shoes.
3) Trail A to A+
4) DRY BAGS highly encouraged, bag car leaving at 2:30 (so don’t be late).
5) Trail and On-After kinda dog friendly with conditions (no dogs at the contra stop, and no dogs in Ogre’s house, the back yard is fenced).
6) We are starting from the same place as last week’s trail BECAUSE WE ARE EVIL. It is a different trail tho.
7) All checks are backchecks.
8) $5 hash cash

MUHAHAHAHAAHAHAA. See you Sunday.

Dec
1
Sun
Hash #1906 – Spermit @ South Park Club House
Dec 1 @ 2:00 pm

Is it a Salmon Permit, or a Sperm that’s a Hermit?  Find the answer this and other interesting questions.  No hash cash.

Trail is dog-friendly, but the bar is not. Trail and bar are baby-friendly. Maybe a water crossing…agile folks dry, not so agile one foot wet, no jumping ability, both feet wet.

Hare hotline: 412.833.5599

Dec
7
Sat
Hash #1907 – Porn Again Christian’s Festivus @ Casa de Caca
Dec 7 @ 12:00 pm

The days are getting longer and the tempers are getting shorter. There is a subtle taste of salt in the air. That must mean it’s almost time to celebrate Festivus. This year Cream of Mushroom and Porn Again Christian have teamed up to lay a trail of salt, sweat, and blood (no flour will be harmed in the laying of this trail). Trail will start sharply at 1pm. You will not want to be late for this. Trail will not be fiddo friendly in the least.

As per usual the hares will provide a few kegs, some food, and a place to party afterwards. If you are planning on partying in to the night I would recommend some backup beer for when the kegs are kicked. No hash cash but a small side dish or something would be awesome. New feets of strength are always accepted as well.

Gather at 12, on out at 1.

If any gimps out there want to drive the beer wagon holla at yo boi.

Dec
15
Sun
Hash #1908 – It’s Beginning to Look a Lot like Beer Near… @ White Eagle
Dec 15 @ 2:00 pm

Co-hared by Just Melissa and professor emeritus Honey Nut Squirreleo.

Are you ready to take off to the North Pole, where the beer is always cold? Trail should be dog friendly, probably even kid friendly. A few good girls and boys may get their stockings stuffed. Food a-plenty at on-after, $5 hash cash or else coal in your solo cup.

Dec
29
Sun
Hash #1910 – Homosexual Equine Cavorting @ Waffalonia Youngstown
Dec 29 @ 2:00 pm

Sup half-minds. Come one, come all (but probably few) to the first ever PGH hash to be hosted in, you guessed it – YOUNGSTOWN, OH. You can make here in an hour if you really put you’re heart into it. Safety third!

There was enough interest (kind of) and let’s be honest y’all needed hares. So join Geost Geoff and I for a mostly flat, doggo friendly, and mostly contra tour of Pittsburgh’s sister city.

On out and after will be at our house. We will have snacks and local beers.

I will also be reaching out to Akron and Cleveland? Idk. We are winging this real hard ???

Ps, there’s plenty of parking but y’all should car pool.