Calendar / Directions

Contact Your Hare-Raiser, Whale’s Vagina today to schedule a Hash!

Submit directions for your Hash!

Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
1
Hash #1906 – Spermit 2:00 pm
Hash #1906 – Spermit @ South Park Club House
Dec 1 @ 2:00 pm
Is it a Salmon Permit, or a Sperm that’s a Hermit?  Find the answer this and other interesting questions.  No hash cash. Trail is dog-friendly, but the bar is not. Trail and bar are baby-friendly. …
2
3
4
5
PITT H3 #211 6:30 pm
PITT H3 #211 @ Coach's bottleshop
Dec 5 @ 6:30 pm
All right you salty bitches. It’s the Festivus pre-lube. What better way to get your asses fired up than have a trail in the South Hills?! Don’t have any grievances to air at Festivus yet? …
6
7
Hash #1907 – Porn Again Christian’s Festivus 12:00 pm
Hash #1907 – Porn Again Christian’s Festivus @ Casa de Caca
Dec 7 @ 12:00 pm
The days are getting longer and the tempers are getting shorter. There is a subtle taste of salt in the air. That must mean it’s almost time to celebrate Festivus. This year Cream of Mushroom …
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
Hash #1908 – It’s Beginning to Look a Lot like Beer Near… 2:00 pm
Hash #1908 – It’s Beginning to Look a Lot like Beer Near… @ White Eagle
Dec 15 @ 2:00 pm
Co-hared by Just Melissa and professor emeritus Honey Nut Squirreleo. Are you ready to take off to the North Pole, where the beer is always cold? Trail should be dog friendly, probably even kid friendly. …
16
17
18
TN@#54: Bitchin Heat & Oodles 6:30 pm
TN@#54: Bitchin Heat & Oodles
Dec 18 @ 6:30 pm
TN@ trails happen every 28 days and are ladies only.
19
PITT H3 #212 – A Very Whaley Xmas 6:30 pm
PITT H3 #212 – A Very Whaley Xmas @ Tramp's
Dec 19 @ 6:30 pm
It’s (almost) the darkest day of the year, so bring a headlamp! This is also the last Pitt H3 trail of the decade. White whale gift exchange following circle, $4 limit. Start is at Tramp’s …
20
21
23
24
25
26
DarkSide #57 – HARE NEEDED 6:30 pm
DarkSide #57 – HARE NEEDED
Dec 26 @ 6:30 pm
DarkSide #57 - HARE NEEDED
Who: HARE NEEDED Where: TBD When: Dec 26 Why: To run a harder, longer trail and enjoy the shit out of it!   Twas the day after X-mas, and all through the town Some crazy …
27
28
29
Hash #1910 – Homosexual Equine Cavorting 2:00 pm
Hash #1910 – Homosexual Equine Cavorting @ Waffalonia Youngstown
Dec 29 @ 2:00 pm
Sup half-minds. Come one, come all (but probably few) to the first ever PGH hash to be hosted in, you guessed it – YOUNGSTOWN, OH. You can make here in an hour if you really …
30
31
Hash #1911 Anal Eaze and Moon – NYE TRAIL & PARTY – Moons 10 Year Plan (Don’t Be Scared) 2:00 pm
Hash #1911 Anal Eaze and Moon – NYE TRAIL & PARTY – Moons 10 Year Plan (Don’t Be Scared) @ Hop Farm Brewing
Dec 31 @ 2:00 pm
Calling all you space cowboys, holographic dudettes, and future farmers of America! Come on out for some hashy fun and ring in 2020 hoedown style! Where: THE DOOR NEXT TO the Hop Farm entrance. Knock twice, …

Feb
19
Tue
FOOL MOON- Moaning Lisa @ Silky's Pub
Feb 19 @ 6:30 pm

Fool Moon PickUp Trail out of Silky’s Pub

I’ll supply circle beers and flour. Bring a light and some folding money.

You won’t be sorry.

Feb
24
Sun
Hash #1867 CockPass- Cocksmitten and SleE-Z Pass @ OTB North Park
Feb 24 @ 2:00 pm

Sunday FEB 24.
Trail is A to B, 3-4 miles, some shiggy, Fido friendly but on-out and apres are not so use your best half-minded judgement.

$5 Hash Cash to help cover Food and Ice-kating at Apres. Circle will be in the parking lot across from The Skating rink because no adult beverages are allowed inside. (However the Manager encouraged parking lot beers and said adult hockey league does the same.)

The rink is an outdoor rink so please have dry bag clothes that are warm enough to skate outside and skates if you have ’em. (Dry Bag and skates can be left in SleE-Z’s car, she’ll be parked at the rink. There is a snack bar with seating and some other benches inside. Dinner and non alcoholic (boo) beverages on the hares. If you have gluten, dairy, meat or other food issues please let SleE-Z know ASAP so there is a backup option–we don’t want to kill ya.

Feb
27
Wed
TN@#43: BitchinHeat & Oodles @ Mixtape
Feb 27 @ 6:30 pm

Join Oodles and BitchinHeat in adventure and oddities as we journey through Garfield. Meet at 6:30pm at the Mixtape. (Check them out at mixtapepgh.com; they are doing some really cool things!). On out at 7pm. Apres will be close by the start in a surprise location. (Dogs are unfortunately not allowed at the start or end; we recommend leaving them home, out of the cold and rain.)

*TN@ trails happen every 28 days and are ladies only.*

Feb
28
Thu
PITT H3 #188 – Cuffed and Sphincter @ Evergreen Cafe
Feb 28 @ 6:30 pm

I know what you’re thinking, “Those assholes again?” Fear not, dear half-mind, we’re offering an olive branch in solemn observation of a murderversary (and arsonversary?). Leave your climbing harnesses, rope, ice axes, dry bags, yea even your trail shoes, neatly stored in your red dress closet. Road shoes, headlamp, and pepper spray should suffice.

It’s an Evergreen hash in honor of Steve, that other guy, and Vinnie the Thief. $5 hash cash, and this one is actually fido friendly.

 

Mar
1
Fri
St. David’s Day Hash – Whiff
Mar 1 @ 6:30 pm

Hare: Whiff (412-979-3314)

Starting in 2000, in response to the termination of the annual Feb. 28 PMS hashes, the March 1 St. David’s Day hash was born. The original premise was simple: go back to British hashing roots with a live hare trail and have beer stops at bars with at least Guinness on tap (try to find a Welsh beer in Pittsburgh). Oh, and daffodils for the bimbos and leeks for the wankers, the two Welsh symbols of St. David. (daffodil in Welsh translated as “David’s leek.”) Starting Britishly at Piper’s Pub, the first trail wound around to McCann’s Pub (now Dish) where a Welsh flag hung from the wall, then to McArdle’s Pub, and on-in. The fourth trail had a beer stop in the middle of McArdle Roadway (a closed-off section under construction) with Welsh ESB. The 10th trail had Brother David’s Tripel and the fifteenth had Merry Monks Tripel. There have been specialty labels at beer stops: Idris Ale and Llareggub Lager – Dylan Thomas’s fictional town – “Buggerall” spelled backwards – on the seventh trail (the first where we were joined by the St. David’s Society) and palindromic titles (Space Caps Retro Porter, Senile Felines Regal Lager, Dr. Awkward Slip Pils) on the fourteenth (the date was 3/1/13). The ninth and sixteenth broke from the live hare tradition as both were laid during blizzards.

This year, St. David returns to the South Side for a trail with some nostalgic undertones. As always, there will be daffodils and leeks. There will be indoor and outdoor beer stops. And, of course, trail will be short, flat, warm, and dry.

Mar
3
Sun
Hash #1868 Whistlepig Crew – Tight-E, Major, and Bonerz @ Pub In The Park
Mar 3 @ 2:00 pm

Yup, you read that right! Bonerz is traveling across the globe to visit so we decided to get the Whistlepig Crew back together for the occasion. I know what you’re thinking, another Swissvale hash?? Well, have no fear, Whistlepigs never disappoint and we’re making sure there’s little overlap with the previous trails.

Apres will be at Major Pecker’s house. Address will be provided on trail or hit up one of the hares if you plan to pimp the apres.

Mar
6
Wed
DS # 49 – HARE NEEDED
Mar 6 @ 9:26 pm

HARE NEEDED! Are you interested? Hit up The Black Clap

Mar
9
Sat
Hash #1869 International Women’s Day + 1 Hash Sherpes @ Mad Mex Shady Side
Mar 9 @ 2:00 pm
Hash #1869 International Women's Day + 1 Hash Sherpes @ Mad Mex Shady Side | Pittsburgh | Pennsylvania | United States
 Shadyside has permit parking on Saturday. There is no residential parking permit required for nearby Shady Avenue and the streets east of Shady. Park there and walk to nearby Highland Ave for On-Start.
apres at Sherpes house, 530 Glen Arden Dr, 15208
Mar
14
Thu
PITT H3 #189 – Hickey and London @ Brook Line N Sinker
Mar 14 @ 6:30 pm

It’s Hickey’s birthday and she didn’t have any other plans.

Mar
17
Sun
Hash #1870 AC/DC, Just Cathy, Putin OTD, Squirreleo & T-Boner @ The Port Vue Pub
Mar 17 @ 2:00 pm
Hash #1870 AC/DC, Just Cathy, Putin OTD, Squirreleo & T-Boner @ The Port Vue Pub | McKeesport | Pennsylvania | United States

What: The March Beerthday / St Patty’s Day Celebration Hash #1870

Where: The Port Vue Pub – 305 Laredo St, 15133 (trail is A to A)

When: Sunday, Sunday, Sunday! March 17th, 2:00 Pee Ehm.

Your Hares: AC/DC, Honeynut Squirreleo, Just Cathy, Putin OTD and T-Boner

Cum one, cum all, to the March Beerthday / St Patty’s Day Celebration Hash! It’ll be the kind of trail that you’ve come to expect from AC/DC and Squirreleo. We’ve got Just Cathy to bring out the Irish in ya and peppering in a bit of Putin’s snarkeyness, balanced with the sanity that T-Boner brings and you’ll enjoy a short, flat, dry, shiggy free trail. Statistically, the whole thing is on pavement and newly mowed lawns. Keep in mind though, statistics (and hares) often lie.

Trail will be suitable for hashers of all kinds. Walkers, wankers, runners, auto hashers, virgins, little ones in backpacks, big ones in backpacks, preggos, doggos, purrry things, whatever you bring that you can keep on a leash. It’s for those who watch NASCAR for the car crashes or who enjoy amateur midget porn. Fornicators, MastRUbaters, Glutard Weirdos, Leg Humpers and other people of low moral standing are all welcome. Hell, you might as well bring your mom too! Be sure, however, to bring your lowest expectations. It’s a Hashy Beerthday / St Patty’s Day Celebration!

I have put in for unpleasant weather so dress appropriately (and by that, I mean slutty) and maybe sport some Irish green.

The Apres will be held at the most prestigious pub in all of Port View, The Port Vue Pub. It’s here where the beer is cold, the food is cheap and the bartender’s best friend is friends with the bus driver who carted us to the start of one of Moon’s trails in Hays about 4 or 5 years ago. They know of us and they’re not afraid.

Who’s Beerthday is in this month: AC/DC, Cock Stroker, Just Cathy, Moon, Squirreleo, Tightee, Tittsburgh, Twat’s Up Cock and maybe more. Am I missing anyone?

Why so many Hares? Time passes, and the youth and vigor of Squirreleo’s l?i?v?e?r? everything doesn’t last forever. He needs this much help hauling the flour.

Will there be beer? You betcha. If you don’t finish trail with a bit of fog in your half-mind, you’ve done something wrong.

NO HASH CASH. Trail beer and down downs are on the Hares; beer and food, before and after trail, is on you.

Dry Bag? Hum, it’ll be a toasty 30 or 40 maybe 50 degrees; your wet socks will help keep you cool.

Fido Friendly? Your dog will love the trail portion of this hash while being free to pee anywhere he/she wants to. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), that excludes the interior of the Port Vue Pub.

So cum for the celebration, the sights, the sounds and stay for the smells. Sprawling scenic vistas will dot this mad lib of an escapade but you’ll probably find something to complain about. What this trail suffers for in length, it will make up for in girth. GUAR-ON-ON-TEED.

Questions? Call Squirreleo: 412-737-2318