What: The March Beerthday / St Patty’s Day Celebration Hash #1870
Where: The Port Vue Pub – 305 Laredo St, 15133 (trail is A to A)
When: Sunday, Sunday, Sunday! March 17th, 2:00 Pee Ehm.
Your Hares: AC/DC, Honeynut Squirreleo, Just Cathy, Putin OTD and T-Boner
Cum one, cum all, to the March Beerthday / St Patty’s Day Celebration Hash! It’ll be the kind of trail that you’ve come to expect from AC/DC and Squirreleo. We’ve got Just Cathy to bring out the Irish in ya and peppering in a bit of Putin’s snarkeyness, balanced with the sanity that T-Boner brings and you’ll enjoy a short, flat, dry, shiggy free trail. Statistically, the whole thing is on pavement and newly mowed lawns. Keep in mind though, statistics (and hares) often lie.
Trail will be suitable for hashers of all kinds. Walkers, wankers, runners, auto hashers, virgins, little ones in backpacks, big ones in backpacks, preggos, doggos, purrry things, whatever you bring that you can keep on a leash. It’s for those who watch NASCAR for the car crashes or who enjoy amateur midget porn. Fornicators, MastRUbaters, Glutard Weirdos, Leg Humpers and other people of low moral standing are all welcome. Hell, you might as well bring your mom too! Be sure, however, to bring your lowest expectations. It’s a Hashy Beerthday / St Patty’s Day Celebration!
I have put in for unpleasant weather so dress appropriately (and by that, I mean slutty) and maybe sport some Irish green.
The Apres will be held at the most prestigious pub in all of Port View, The Port Vue Pub. It’s here where the beer is cold, the food is cheap and the bartender’s best friend is friends with the bus driver who carted us to the start of one of Moon’s trails in Hays about 4 or 5 years ago. They know of us and they’re not afraid.
Who’s Beerthday is in this month: AC/DC, Cock Stroker, Just Cathy, Moon, Squirreleo, Tightee, Tittsburgh, Twat’s Up Cock and maybe more. Am I missing anyone?
Why so many Hares? Time passes, and the youth and vigor of Squirreleo’s l?i?v?e?r? everything doesn’t last forever. He needs this much help hauling the flour.
Will there be beer? You betcha. If you don’t finish trail with a bit of fog in your half-mind, you’ve done something wrong.
NO HASH CASH. Trail beer and down downs are on the Hares; beer and food, before and after trail, is on you.
Dry Bag? Hum, it’ll be a toasty 30 or 40 maybe 50 degrees; your wet socks will help keep you cool.
Fido Friendly? Your dog will love the trail portion of this hash while being free to pee anywhere he/she wants to. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), that excludes the interior of the Port Vue Pub.
So cum for the celebration, the sights, the sounds and stay for the smells. Sprawling scenic vistas will dot this mad lib of an escapade but you’ll probably find something to complain about. What this trail suffers for in length, it will make up for in girth. GUAR-ON-ON-TEED.
Questions? Call Squirreleo: 412-737-2318