Hash #2098, Schoolhouse Cock, TLC, & Jinkies

November 26, 2023 @ 2:00 pm
Dive Bar & Grille
S Braddock Ave

I am taking advantage of the fact that Snatch Rabbit literally begged me to take this trail to find out exactly how low I can go. What is the bare minimum of preparation? Jinkies and TLC eagerly agreed to help me find out. Smitten very reluctantly agreed to clean up our mess. So join us for this half-half-minded trail, which I guess I should technically refer to as a quarter-minded trail but that would require doing math, so let’s just round up and call it one-eighth-minded.

Here’s the deal: This will be a live-haired event with no scouting. Jinkies & TLC will show up with flour and do whatever Schoolhouse tells them to do (trust her to use this power well if not wisely). They have no idea where trail is going. Schoolhouse will likely not know where trail is going. Smitten will have some idea of where we will end up and will serve as sweeper and official trail therapist and hugger for anyone who is traumatized by the total lack of planning that has gone into this shit show. Can it be less organized than a Moon trail? Let’s find out!

Hash Cash?: Bring money for a contra stop since we’re too lazy to lay more than one beer stop.

Distance?: YMMV. We will have Turkey/Eagle splits but only one of them will be marked. We’ll let you know how long it is when we are done laying it.

Dogs?: Sure. Except for the contra stop which may or may not allow dogs depending on where it is which I don’t know.

Dry bag?: I won’t try to get you wet but that doesn’t mean there won’t be water crossings. IDK.

Trail shoes?: IDK. Probably.

Location?: The web says Dive Bar is open, so I guess we’ll meet there.

Costumes?: Would I miss a chance to dress up Jinkies? This will be an animal print themed trail which is the lowest, low effort costume possible. If you don’t already have something animal print, why are you even hashing? (We will extend the definition of animal print to include anything with ears. Come on. You’ve got something.)

What did I forget? Probably a lot. But I’ll make up for it by being very prompt with unhelpful replies to all of your trail related questions.

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