PITTH3 – Charter

THE PITTSBURGH INEBRIATED THIRSTY THURSDAYS

HASH HOUSE HARRIERS CHARTER

This association shall be known as The Pittsburgh Inebriated Thirsty Thursdays Hash House Harriers (PITT H3). Effective 27 June, 2013.

The PITT H3 will meet every other Thursday at 6:30pm on out at 7pm from any club, pub, vacant lot, parking structures or premises with in the city limits of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvan-I- A.

The PITT H3 kennel follows the Pittsburgh H3 Code of Conduct.


OBJECTIVES

  • To promote physical fitness amongst its members.
  • To set the stage for weekend hangovers.
  • To acquire a good thirst and satisfy it with beer.
  • To persuade the older members that they are not as old as the feel.
  • To prove to younger members that they are not as spry as they think they are.

MEMBERSHIP

  • Membership is open to all persons who are interested in taking part in a fortnightly hash.
  • A person wishing to join the Hash merely shows up at a Hash and is thereafter considered to be a member until they decide they don’t want to Hash anymore, which is dumb, but it happens.

ENTRANCE FEES, SUBSCRIPTIONS, AND OTHER DUES

  • No entrance fee is payable by VIRGIN hashers.
  • Hare fees are free not to exceed 4 Hares. Additional Hares will pay $5 each. All hares will receive hare credit.
  • Exceptions for Special Events.

RULES & TRADITIONS

HARE GUIDELINES

  • All trails must be live.
  • Trails must be within the city limits of Pittsburgh, or easily accessible. Mismanagement has the right to deny or allow an area as they deem necessary.
  • Trails should be 3-4 miles. 5 Miles MAX.
  • Circle MUST be outside:
    • Circle must be in a secluded area where we won’t bother or be bothered by police and muggles.
    • Coordinate with the Beermeister to determine how beer will get to circle.
    • The Beermeister will supply the beer and snacks for circle.
    • DO NOT TELL anyone, under any circumstances, where circle is EVER!!!
      • If any pimps want to show up… direct them to the on after.
    • Hares are responsible for supplying (which means paying for) TWO BEER Stops.
      • Stops can be inside or outside. If inside, hares are required to purchase enough for all hashers to have at least 1 beer.
      • Beer quests are not equivalent of a beer stop.
  • Hares must acknowledge if 3 marks are on OR if all falses are marked. Must be let known at chalk talk.
  • Hares will have 8 minutes to start before on out.
  • Hares should wait at each beer stop until the last of the pack show up. Once everyone has arrived they should notify the hareraiser, and get their ass out on trial.

IN THE EVENT THE HARE IS CAUGHT

  • The person who catches the hare takes the hare’s dog tags/necklace.
  • Give the hare 5 minutes to get moving.
  • In circle hare(s) must:
    • Strip down to as close to naked as comfortable.
    • Get on their knees in circle until allowed to get up by RA.
    • Must do a down-down.

NAMING

  • To be eligible for naming one must have run 5 trails and hared 1 trail.
  • Questioning will be conducted by the entire circle to assist in name development.
  • The unnamed hasher must leave circle while names are discussed and decided upon.
  • A hasher named in a PITT circle will be gifted necklace.

COMMEMORATIVES

  • 10 trails & 1 hare: Dog Tags
  • 25 trails & 3 hares: Drinking Vessel
  • 50 Trails: Patch, every 50 trails hare receives a new 50 trail patch
  • 10 Hares: Patch
  • 130 trails and 13 hares: Fur Vest
  • Perfect attendance for one year: Award presented at Annual General Meeting (AGM) weekend
  • Flouring the hare should only occur at naming and when receiving tags.
  • Further commemoratives will be decided upon as the hash nears notable accomplishments or events.

BYLAWS

  • The recitation of “Head, who said Head” will result in a punishment most foul.
  • Hares must follow the PITT hare guidelines, under penalty of death.
  • INDUSTRY on Butler Street will not be utilized…ever…like, NOT IN A MILLION YEARS!!!
  • No Tech on Trail, especially at Circle.
  • The RA may bless the hares before each trail with the hares’ consent.
  • Mismanagement should review the charter each year at the first meeting after the AGM to ensure everyone knows what the fuck it says.
  • Mismanagement may update the charter, as needed, as long as the changes remain in line with the founding spirit of PITT H3.

HASH RULES

  • NO WHINING
  • There is no rule #2
  • See rule 1
  • No stealing (see hereunder-definition of stealing):
    • Stealing: the covert removal of another Hasher’s property with the intention of depriving said hasher of such property for an indefinite period of time.
  • No stealing, but borrowing is okay (see hereunder-definition of borrowing):
    • Borrowing: the act of covert temporary removal of another Hasher’s property (property in this instance is confined to items of a portable nature and directly related to hashing such as mugs, bugles and run books). Substantial items such as kegs whilst being directly related to hashing should never be borrowed. At all times the property borrowed is held for a relatively short period of time and always returned in good order. Often such property is enhanced by suitable engraving to record for posterity the guile of the borrower. Borrowing is a complex issue and where any doubt exists the Grand Master should be consulted.
  • Rain is not permitted during Hash runs:
    The Religious Advisor is personally responsible for ensuring that fine conditions prevail for a period of not less than one hour each Thursday trail from 6:30pm to 11:00 PM EST.
  • No tax collectors
  • No discrimination:
    Unemployed, dogs, women, criminals, disabled, nymphomaniacs, and even lawyers are all encouraged to run in the Hash. Alcoholics are particularly welcome. Athletes are tolerated (barely). Athletes and dogs whilst permitted to run, can never aspire to become Grand Master.
  • Down-downs may not be declined, but alternate beverages or showing skin may be allowed at the discretion of the RA.
  • No competitiveness
  • No training:
    • Persons caught training will be deemed to have breached rule 11 and will be liable to a charge. A range of activities may be interpreted as training, and for guidance the following non-exhaustive list is provided:
      • Running other than official Hash runs, unless a Hash event
      • Cycling (fornication on a push bike is exempt)
      • Visiting a gymnasium for any other purpose than perving on the aerobics class
      • Using the stairs while escalators are available
      • Wearing of competitive clothing at the hash
      • New shoes will not be tolerated. Really.
  • All Hashers must commit to memory rules 1, 2, 3, 9, 10, 13, and 18 and be able to recite them at any hour of the day or night regardless of their state of inebriation.
  • No fighting at Hash. This rule is absolute and the entire culture of Hash relies on strict adherence to this rule. If a fellow Hasher causes you immense displeasure by stealing your car or impregnating your daughter (wives are exempt) then belt shit out of him at some other place than Hash and on some other day than Thursday which is a day of reverence and tranquility–and the day of the Hash.
  • No bikes.
  • Other rules may be enacted by the committee as they see fit.
  • Amendments to Rules 1, 2, 3, 6, 8, 9, 11, 13, and 18 are illegal.
  • When the Hash Shit is awarded, the awardees shall carry the Hash Shit at the next trail. Treat the Hash Shit with respect and add one item per week while the Hash Shit is in your possession until passed on to the next awardees at the behest of the Hash. Hash Shit retires at AGM, and new Hash Shit is started.
  • The FRB medal goes to the hound who makes it to circle first. They wanted to win the hash, so they have to carry a heavy piece of shit on the next trail to learn their lesson.
  • The Beermeister takes the Hash Shit and FRB medal at the end of circle and brings them to the next trail for the RA to hand out at chalk talk.
  • There are no rules!

MIS-MANAGEMENT

The Hash is to be run effectively but cooperatively.  A Mis-Management committee shall be established that will consist of the following members at a Minimum:

  • Founder/Hash Master
  • Grand Master/Mattress (GM)
  • Religious Advisor (RA)
  • Hash Cash
  • Hare Raiser
  • Scribe
  • Beermeister
  • Webmeister
  • Haberdasher

Committee Members will serve at the leisure of the Hash and may be changed at the Annual General Meeting, hereafter AGM.

If an unscheduled Mis-Management meeting is called by any member of Mis-Management, a 24-hour lead time is required.

AGM should be held annually in June or July as near to the anal-versary of this humble kennel.


Changing of Mis-Management:

Members of will be changed at AGM. In order to be eligible to be a member of Mis-Management, a Hasher must meet the following requirements:

  • Have run at least 15 trails with the PITT H3
  • Have run with at least 3 other hash Kennels (this includes events)
  • Must show up to the PITT H3 trails regularly, and have hared at least 5 PITT trails
  • Be in good standing with the hash and with Mismanagement

Should a member of Mismanagement be deemed unfit to hold a designated position, that member of Mismanagement may be replaced at any Mismanagement meeting by a majority vote. The first choice of replacement shall be the Alter-person. Should there be no Alter-person, the Mismanagement will vote on a new member of Mismanagement.


Duties of each position of Mismanagement

FOUNDER/HASH MASTER

Defender of Peedom, Cream of Mushroom, Curb Appeal, Glitter Spitter, ManGurglar

  • May serve as a PITT H3 representative at any Hash Function
  • Ensure PITT H3 kennel proceeds in direction of original intent
  • May be invited to Mismanagement meetings to uphold intent of Founders

GM (GRAND MASTER)

  • Ensure Mismanagement members are upholding standards of positions
    • Replace Mismanagement members who are not fulfilling responsibilities
  • Speak with officials should any question of Hash activities arise
  • Fill any role of Mismanagement when needed
  • Be the first point of contact for general PITT H3 hash business
  • Be PITT H3 representative at large Events (DC RDR, AIH, Stinko, etc.)
  • Ensure quarterly Mismanagement meetings are being conducted
  • Inquire of PITT H3 Founders for direction on any unknown hash business
  • Maintain a minimum trail attendance of 75%
  • Must have at least 2 years of hashing experience before being eligible.

RA (RELIGIOUS ADVISER)

  • Chalk Talk:
    • Recognize visitors and virgins
    • Explain the marking of trails
  • Circle:
    • ALWAYS will begin circle with a toast to G.
    • Maintain order in circle.
    • Recognize visitors, virgins, birthdays, anniversaries, FRB, FBI, DFL, etc.
    • Visitors are called upon to sing a song, tell a joke or show body part
      • Virgins are taught down-down by sponsor.
        • If Virgin is self-starter RA is down-down demonstrator
    • Call for accusations
    • Open circle for announcements
    • Close circle with PITT song and salutation, “May the hash go in peace”
  • Commemorative ceremonies:
    • Present item
    • Make recipient do a down-down
    • Lead song
  • Naming ceremony:
    • Inform kennel when a Hasher is going to be named at earliest convenience
    • Conduct questioning of to-be-named hasher
    • Conduct suggestions
    • Have to-be-named Hasher escorted away from circle
      • Escort should not allow to-be-named hasher to overhear voting
    • Conduct voting
      • Do not name to-be-named Hasher if a good name is not devised
    • Make to-be-named Hasher get a down-down beverage
    • Conduct “Old McHasher” once name is bestowed
  • Ensure continuity of PITT H3 traditions and general Hash traditions.
  • Fill in as RA during other Hash events if requested to do so.
  • Be PITT H3 representative at large events.
  • Maintain a minimum trail attendance of 75%.

HARERAISER

  • Ensure a trail is provided every fortnight.
  • Get trail write-up from the Hare. If the Hare is a slacker, create a writeup on their behalf.
  • Update website and social media with trail details.
  • Advertise events and trails that need Hares.
  • If someone fails to sign-up to Hare, or if the Hare cannot lay trail at the last minute, the HareRaiser is responsible for laying trail.
  • Show up to trail with additional flour, chalk, toilet paper, flour bag, etc., in the event the Hare needs said items, or needs a co-hare.
  • Have Hares/trails scheduled out as far as possible.
  • Provide trails for additional Hash activities if called upon.
  • Assist any Hare when requested.
  • If any Hasher is presumed lost/missing, search for that person with the hares once circle has ended.
  • Maintain a minimum trail attendance of 75%.

HABERDASHER

  • Promote sales of PITT H3 items.
  • Keep track of inventory.
  • Report sales and inventory to Hash Cash.
  • Receive approval from a majority of Mismanagement before purchasing Items.
  • Maintain a list of suppliers and quality of items from said suppliers.
  • If unable to show up to trails, ensure another member of Mismanagement has items to sell.
  • Maintain a minimum trail attendance of 50%.

HASH CASH

  • Collect weekly trail Hash Cash.
  • Collect any additional trail fees and ensure they are distributed to the correct recipients.
  • Reimburse BeerMeister.
  • Keep account of all money coming into and being paid out of the hash.
  • Quarterly accounting reports to Mismanagement.
  • Register people who have attended trail each week.
    • This includes names, birthdays (birth months) date of first trail attended.
  • Collect Hash Cash.
  • Check ID if virgin hasher appears to be younger or close to the age of 21.
  • Transfer Hash Cash for trail to Mismanagement Hash Cash.
  • Make notes of visitors, virgins, birthdays and anniversaries and let attending RA know.
  • Maintain accurate records of trail attendance by week and by Hash year.
  • Ensure proper trail counts are given to WebMeister.
  • If Sign-in cannot go to trail, arrangements must be made with another member of Mismanagement to do this duty.
  • The substitute Sign-In is responsible for relaying sign in records to official Sign-In, as well as transferring funds to official Hash Cash.
  • Keep Mismanagement apprised of anniversaries for next three trails.
  • Maintain a minimum trail attendance of 75%.

WEBMEISTER

  • Assist with maintaining current and future trail info on website and FB.
  • Monitor the Gmail account and forward e-mails as appropriate to PITT Mismanagement.
  • Monitor Facebook group.
  • No minimum trail attendance.

BEERMEISTER

  • Provide cold beverages (beer and water at minimum) for end circle each week.
  • Provide Food, usually in the form of chips, cookies, etc.
  • Provide Trash receptacles and cups.
  • Clean coolers each week.
  • Takes Hash Shit and FRB medal at the end of circle and brings it to chalk talk at the next trail.
  • Stay within a reasonable weekly budget and submit receipts to Hash Cash for reimbursement.
    • BeerMeister will not be reimbursed without receipts.
    • Additional costs may be incurred for larger events and these expenses must be approved by Hash Cash before purchases are made.
  • Coordinate with hares if trail is A to B.
  • If BeerMeister cannot go to the end of trail, arrangements must be made with another member of Mismanagement to do this duty.
  • Beer needs to be kept cold during the week between trails. No dramatic temperature change
  • No alcohol will be provided to anyone under 21 years of age.
  • Maintain a minimum trail attendance of 75%.

SCRIBE

  • Keep minutes at all Mismanagement meetings and distribute to all Mismanagement members.
  • Tries their best to publish PITT SHIT newsletter. Ideally, this is done after each trail, but we’ll take what we can get.
  • Fills in for other MM positions if able.

Charter revised August 1, 2023

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