DS #87 – Bitchin Wheelbarrow

Darkside for the rest of us:

It all started when your glory-seeking hares thought about starting their own kennel like all the cool kids. Quickly realizing that it takes work and requires convincing AZ to hare-raise another group, they settled on haring a short, flat, and shiggy-free trail. Otherwise known as a Dark Side.
Join your hares for a trail for the common man/woman/person.

The short version:
Where: Brookline and Sinker, 806 Brookline Blvd., Pittsburgh, PA 15226

When: MONDAY September 26th. Meet at 6:30pm, On-Out at 7pm

Hares: Wheelbarrow Willie and BitchinHeat

Hash Cash: $5

Why: If you have to ask you don’t know

Now some Q&A/the long story:

Never done a Dark Side trail? What are you waiting for – a fucking invitation? If so, you are cordially invited to join us on a nice little romp through the streets, dirt, and trees of Brookline. Oh, and fuck you.

Will trail be long? Not everything is about length folks but we encourage exaggerating numbers.

Will trail have hills? Pittsburgh, especially Brookline, is flat as proven by the 1901 land survey Sherpes found at goodwill.

Can I walk all of trail? This is highly NOT recommended. If you plan to walk trail, please contact the hares to potentially short-cut you.

Can I take a dog? Friendly dogs that won’t try to kill us are ok. We have trail for that. However, make sure your dog is able to actually handle the distance (~ 7 miles and much more if you are one of those overzealous FRB hounds) and won’t go biting people or other people’s dogs. You biting dogs know who you are; this rule does not pertain to BiH who may or may not have bitten both people and dogs in the past…

Will there be enough beer? For the hares and FRBs – yes

Will trail be fun and well thought out? Your hares promise they will have fun like they dreamed about in the summer of ‘59. Your fun is your own problem.

Will I get a prize for murdering lantern flies? Sure, ask the RA.

What was a major fashion trend of the 10th century? Men in high hills

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 364

What is the secret to life? 42

Will we start at a bar? Yes the hares will start at Brookline and Sinker. A true dark DarkSider would start at their house and run to the on out bar but hey shortcut if you want.

Have other questions? Want to know the probability that you will survive this trail? Contact BiH (908) 380-2629 or Wheelbarrow (412) 953-5062.